💸 Your Tax Dollars at Work: Arizona's Educational Money Laundering Program

🔍 From Zero to Zero: The School That Couldn't Teach Math Twice. Failed charter transforms into religious academy, collapses with taxpayer dollars

Jan 17, 2025

When a failed charter school can simply change its name, declare itself religious, collect voucher money, and fail again—all while our state's top education official celebrates less oversight—we've moved beyond educational choice into educational chaos.

😽 Keepin’ It Simple Summary for Younger Readers
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💰 Imagine giving someone money to build a 🏠 house, but not checking if they know how to build houses or even have construction materials. That's basically what's happening in Arizona's schools right now. The state is giving millions of taxpayer dollars to private schools without making sure they can actually 📚 teach students or stay open for a full year.

One school failed so badly at teaching math that not a single student passed state tests 📉, but instead of fixing the problems, they just changed their name and kept getting public money 💵 until they suddenly closed down, leaving students stranded mid-year 😟.

Meanwhile, the person in charge of Arizona's schools is celebrating 🎉 having even less oversight of how these schools spend public money.

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🗝️ Takeaways

🚩 A failed charter school with 0% math proficiency rebranded as a private religious academy and continued receiving public money through vouchers
📉 The school lasted only months before abandoning students mid-semester, leaving behind molding food and confidential records
💰 Arizona's voucher program provides zero oversight for schools receiving an average of $7,000 per student in taxpayer funds
🎪 State Superintendent Tom Horne actively celebrates the dismantling of educational oversight while supporting unregulated voucher expansion
🏢 The state requires no proof of academic standards, financial stability, or teacher qualifications from voucher-receiving schools
🔄 The cycle of failure is perfectly legal under Arizona's system, allowing failed schools to simply rebrand and continue receiving public funds

From Strip Mall to Stripped Dreams: Arizona's Unregulated Voucher Program Claims Another Victim

In what could be called a tragicomedy of educational errors (if it weren't so devastating for actual students), a failed Arizona charter school managed to rebrand itself as a religious private school, collect taxpayer dollars through vouchers, and promptly collapse—leaving students stranded between a China Palace and crushed educational dreams.

Welcome to the Wild West of educational "choice," where the only choice seems to be between unaccountable and completely unaccountable.

A Tale of Two Schools (Actually Just One, With a Quick Costume Change)

First, there was ARCHES Academy, a charter school with academic performance so dismal (0% math proficiency, anyone?) that the state charter board finally pulled the plug.

But in Arizona's anything-goes voucher wonderland, failure is just a rebrand opportunity.

Quick as you can say "taxpayer dollars," ARCHES transformed into Title of Liberty Academy, a private Mormon school, complete with Book of Mormon quotes on the walls and a misspelled banner proclaiming its status as a "celestial stronghold of learing [sic]."

Nothing says educational excellence quite like spelling errors in your mission statement.

The Cherry on Top? Our Superintendent's Support

While this educational shell game plays out, Arizona's Superintendent of Public Instruction, Tom Horne, is practically popping champagne at the prospect of eliminating the Department of Education altogether.

"I throw a party to celebrate," he declares, apparently seeing no irony in cheering the death of oversight while failed schools play musical chairs with public money.

It's like celebrating the removal of health inspectors while running a restaurant that gives everyone food poisoning.

A Strip Mall Education Special: Now With Extra Toppings of Negligence!

Want to know what Arizona's voucher program doesn't require from schools receiving public funds?

Buckle up, because this list is shorter than a summer school semester:

Any proof they can actually educate children
Evidence they won't vanish mid-semester
Basic financial stability checks
Teacher qualifications beyond "has breathed oxygen"
A building that isn't sandwiched between a Fortune Cookie factory and a discount dental clinic

The Freedom to Fail, Now With Public Funding!

The school's founder, Michelle Edwards, seemed almost shocked by the lack of oversight, telling ProPublica it was "shocking how little oversight" the state would provide.

When you're surprising even the people benefiting from your lack of regulations, maybe—just maybe—you've gone too far. Edwards and her team called "every agency under the sun" asking what standards they'd have to meet.

The response? Crickets, with a side of "Why are you even asking?"

The Aftermath: A Zombie School's Last Dance

In a scene that could've been pulled from a dystopian education thriller, ProPublica found:

Hundreds of books scattered across the floor
Confidential student records left out in the open
Molding food in the cafeteria
A banner proudly proclaiming they would strive to be a "celestial stronghold of lering [sic]"
Flyers printed at Walmart advertising ESA voucher enrollment

Horne's Horror Show: A Symphony of Systematic Destruction

Our state superintendent's enthusiasm for dismantling educational oversight while championing:

An unregulated voucher program that's bleeding state coffers dry
Armed police in schools (because nothing says "learning environment" like tactical gear)
Dismissive attitudes toward Indigenous students
A general disdain for public education that would make Betsy DeVos blush

The Price Tag of "Freedom"

Arizona's ESA program gives parents an average of over $7,000 per child per year in taxpayer funds to spend on private education. That's $7,000 that could be:

Spent on actual public schools
Used to raise teacher salaries
Invested in educational infrastructure
Or, apparently, handed over to strip mall schools with zero accountability

A Modest Proposal (That We Actually Need)

Rather than celebrating the dismantling of oversight, perhaps we could try these radical ideas:

Basic accountability measures for voucher-receiving schools
Financial stability requirements (beyond "has a checking account")
Academic performance standards that exceed "exists in physical space"
Actually checking if schools exist before sending them money
Making sure the people running these schools can spell "learning"

The Bottom Line

The real choice now is whether we'll continue allowing public funds to support this expensive experiment in educational darwinism, or demand actual accountability for our children's futures.

After all, if you're going to run education like a business, shouldn't we at least expect the basic accountability we'd demand from a lemonade stand?

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#StripMallSchooling, #VoucherChaos, #AZEdFail, #WhereDidTheMoneyGo?