🇺🇸 From Bankruptcy to the White House: Trump with Casinos and Bush with Oil... in Texas

The astonishing connection between financial failure and presidential success in the U.S.

Donald Trump brags about how well his businesses have fared in bankruptcy. And in fact, no major U.S. company has filed for Chapter 11 more than Trump's casino empire in the last 30 years.

"I have used the laws of this country ... the [bankruptcy] chapter laws, to do a great job for my company, for myself, for my employees, for my family," he said during the first Republican presidential debate on August 6.

— CNN

😽 Keepin’ It Simple Summary for Younger Readers
👧🏾✊🏾👦🏾

Some famous people, like Donald Trump 💼 and George W. Bush 🇺🇸, tried to run big businesses but ended up losing a lot of money 💸 instead. Trump lost money running casinos 🎰, and Bush lost money trying to drill for oil 🛢️. Surprisingly, even though they didn't do well in business, they both became President of the United States! 🎉 This shows that sometimes in America, failing in business can actually help you win in politics 🗳️.

🗝️ Takeaways

• 💸 Trump’s Casino Catastrophes: Managed to bankrupt three casinos in Atlantic City while the odds were in his favor.

• 🛠️ Bush’s Oil Misadventure: Oversaw a failing oil business during a time when profits were just waiting to be made.

• 📊 Electoral College Oddities: Both Trump and Bush became presidents despite losing the popular vote.

• 📈 Failing Upwards: In America, spectacular business failures can propel you into political success.

• 🔄 A Reverse Meritocracy: It seems the more you fail in business, the more you qualify for the highest office in the land.

---

🇺🇸 Masters of Disaster: How to Bankrupt a Casino, Botch Oil Drilling, and Still Become President

The House Always Wins (Unless You're Trump)

Let's start with a riddle: What do you call someone who loses money running a casino? Most people would say "impossible," - but Donald Trump says, "Hold my gold-plated beer."

In the history of spectacular business failures, bankrupting a casino sits somewhere between losing money selling water in the Sahara and going broke running a toll booth.

The casino business model is beautifully simple: People walk in with money, pull some levers, watch some lights flash, and leave with less money. Mathematics itself is your business partner. The odds are literally in your favor - it's right there in the phrase "the house always wins."

Yet somehow, Trump managed to bankrupt not one, not two, but three casinos in Atlantic City.

The Trump Taj Mahal went bankrupt faster than a poker player with a two-seven offsuit going all-in. Trump Plaza folded like a cheap lawn chair. Trump Castle crumbled like, well, a castle made of casino chips.

It's the kind of achievement that makes you wonder if he was playing with a deck of 53 cards - and still losing.

Oil's Well That Ends Unwell: The Bush Saga

Meanwhile, in the heart of Texas, George W. Bush was performing his own miracle of anti-capitalism.

Picture this: You're in Midland, Texas, during the oil boom. You've got an oil company. In Texas. During the OIL BOOM. This is like having a snowcone stand during a heatwave - you'd have to actively try to lose money.

But our Yale-educated, Harvard MBA-holding hero (who couldn't get into Texas A&M on his own merits) found a way. His company, Arbusto Energy (Spanish for "bush," because apparently even his company name needed daddy's help), managed to drill its way straight through success and come out the other side covered in red ink instead of black gold.

The Path to Profitless Prosperity

• Started with millions in family connections and investor money? Check.

• Located in a region where oil prospectors were striking it rich by accident? Check.

• Had a father who was vice president of the United States? Check.

• Still managed to fail spectacularly? Double check with a side of crude.

The Electoral College: Where Losing Means Winning

But wait, there's more!

Because in America, spectacular business failure is apparently a prerequisite for political success. Both these titans of financial torpor managed to become president despite losing the popular vote, thanks to that peculiar piece of political plumbing known as the Electoral College - a system designed to give slave states extra political power by counting enslaved people as three-fifths of a person for representation while giving them zero-fifths of a vote.

The Math of Democracy't

• Trump: Lost by 2.9 million votes = Became president

• Bush: Lost by 540,000 votes = Became president

• Basic arithmetic: Died of embarrassment

The American Dream™: Fail Big, Fail Often, Fail Upward

What's the moral of our story? In America, you can:

• Bankrupt a casino where math itself is your partner

• Lose money drilling for oil in Texas during an oil boom

• Lose the popular vote in a presidential election

• Still end up in the White House signing executive orders

It's like a reverse meritocracy where the more spectacularly you fail at business, the more qualified you become to run the country. These aren't just failures - they're failures with flourish, disasters with distinction, fiascos with flair!

Conclusion: The House Always Wins (Just Not the White House)

So the next time someone tells you about pulling yourself up by your bootstraps or the magic of the free market, remind them about the casino king who couldn't beat the house odds and the oil prince who couldn't strike oil in Texas.

Then remind them that both these sterling examples of business acumen became president without winning the most votes, thanks to a system designed to protect slave state power.

If this doesn't perfectly encapsulate the gap between American myths and American reality, I don't know what does. But hey, at least we can take comfort in knowing that if you're going to fail, fail big - the presidency might just be your consolation prize.

---

---

☕ If you enjoyed this article, give us a tip! We 🤎☕‼️

---