👵 America's Eldercare Emergency: Families Left to Fend for Themselves | BUCKMASTER SHOW

The brutal truth about aging in a country with a crumbling safety net. O'Connor's "rocket science" approach to breaking free from destructive habits.

May 14, 2025

😽 Keepin’ It Simple Summary for Younger Readers
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📺 The Buckmaster Show covered: 📊 Stock market's crazy reactions to Trump's 🇨🇳 China tariff flip-flops • 🏠 Housing costs skyrocketing due to government fees • 👵 Eldercare crisis leaving families unprepared • 🚀 O'Connor's "gumption" guide to self-improvement that works like rocket fuel for breaking bad habits • 💪 Learning to "suffer better" and be kind to yourself

🗝️ Takeaways

💹 Financial markets are experiencing "whiplash" due to Trump's erratic tariff announcements, with investors irrationally celebrating a vague "agreement to have an agreement."
🏘️ Between 25-43% of new housing costs come from government fees and regulations, creating significant barriers to affordable housing
👴 40-50% of retiring Americans can't handle even a $400 unexpected expense, making eldercare planning a critical yet overlooked priority
🚀 Changing entrenched behaviors requires immense initial energy, like a rocket using 80% of its fuel just to escape Earth's gravity
🫂 The path to self-improvement includes "suffering better" and learning kindness toward others as a way to develop kindness toward oneself

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Market Whiplash and Mind Medicine: Buckmaster Show Dissects Trump's Tariff Theatrics and the Gumption Gap

In the latest episode of the Bill Buckmaster Show, guest host Ben Buehler-Garcia took the reins and treated listeners to a thought-provoking journey through financial markets, eldercare challenges, and the intriguing concept of "gumption" as a tool for self-improvement. With his characteristic warmth and curiosity, Ben navigated conversations that touched on everything from tariff tussles to the tender topic of placing loved ones in care facilities.

And what better time for a deep dive into these issues than now, when our economic system seems designed to serve the whims of Wall Street rather than the needs of ordinary Americans struggling with housing costs and eldercare expenses that would make even Jeff Bezos flinch?

Financial Follies with Shelly Fishman: Tariffs, Tantrums, and the Theater of Economic Absurdity

The show kicked off with regular financial advisor Shelly Fishman, who didn't mince words about the current state of our economic roller coaster. "There is whiplash going on big time right now," Fishman declared, skewering both the administration for their "shiny objects that the administration throws up to get the press diverted from what may be really going on" and professional investors who should know better but still react like hormonal teenagers to every presidential tweet.

Because nothing says "stable economic policy" like governance-by-impulse and markets that respond to vague promises like dogs hearing the rustle of a treat bag.

The market's reaction to Trump's recent announcement about an "agreement to have an agreement" with China regarding tariffs perfectly illustrates our collective economic ADHD. After just a few weeks of escalating trade tensions where tariffs were jacked up to punitive levels (145% on Chinese goods, with China retaliating at 125%), suddenly there's talk of reducing them to 30% and 10% respectively. Trump artificially creates a crisis, then swoops in with a half-solution, and expects applause for solving a problem he manufactured. And how did Wall Street respond to this vague promise of future negotiations? With a massive rally that Fishman essentially characterized as delusional optimism.

"Nothing substantial happened that would make the markets react as they did," Fishman pointed out, highlighting the disconnect between market enthusiasm and economic reality. The conversation revealed the theatre of it all – Trump announces a "nice announcement" about "kind of" agreeing with China to talk about tariffs, delaying implementation for 90 days, "and the market said, yay." The infantilization of our economic system would be comical if it weren't affecting millions of livelihoods.

The financial facts laid bare: The Dow is down about 0.3% year-to-date (compared to its historical 12% annual gains), the S&P 500 is up a measly half percentage point, and NASDAQ still hasn't recovered from its earlier losses. Meanwhile, the bond market—that crucial barometer of international confidence in the American economy—is sending subtle but alarming signals about foreign investors' "reluctance to reinvest in US securities."

"That was very alarming," Fishman noted about international investor hesitation. "In fact, the first kind of back off from the Trump tariff positions occurred when we began to see countries like Japan and China, etc., reluctant to reinvest in treasuries."

When even our creditors are getting nervous, perhaps it's time to question the economic "genius" claiming to make America great again.

Fishman didn't hold back on tariff politics either: "Using tariffs as a bludgeon to get people to talk to you is entirely unnecessary and has never worked." A refreshingly blunt assessment in an era where economic saber-rattling passes for sophisticated diplomacy. "This is not the way to conduct foreign policy. And it's certainly not the way to allow business people to plan for what they're going to do in the future," he added, highlighting how the administration's erratic approach creates uncertainty that paralyzes business planning and investment.

Heaven forbid we implement economic policies with predictability and purpose rather than using global trade as a stage for political theatrics.

The Housing Crisis: Where Regulation Meets Reality

The discussion took a sobering turn toward housing affordability, with Ben highlighting how between 25% and 43% of new housing costs stem from government fees and regulations. "Both the city and the county are looking at raising impact fees, another 43%," Ben noted, pointing to a system that seems designed to make housing less accessible rather than more.

While Fishman acknowledged the complexity, he advocated for "a rational plan" with regulatory flexibility. "What we need is a rational plan that says these are the regulations. There are ways around those regulations and to mitigate those regulations. And we need speed so that we can build intermediary. And we don't have that now."

Imagine that – suggesting our regulatory systems should actually facilitate solutions rather than creating more barriers. Revolutionary!

"Because of the crisis with low-cost housing, it makes sense. And we've got to do something, and we don't have the means to do it. Nor do we have the policy specifics that allow lawmakers to make those decisions," Fishman continued, highlighting the paralysis of a system caught between acknowledging a crisis and being unwilling to make the regulatory changes necessary to address it.

The conversation painted a stark picture of how bureaucratic hurdles directly impact real people's ability to find homes they can afford. It's a classic example of how complex regulatory systems, even when created with good intentions, can calcify into barriers that protect existing interests while preventing necessary evolution.

In a country where we can figure out how to deliver packages by drone within hours, we somehow can't figure out how to build affordable housing for working families. Priorities, America, priorities.

The Eldercare Crisis: When Financial Planning Meets Human Reality

Perhaps most poignant was their discussion of eldercare planning. Ben shared his family's recent traumatic experience placing a relative in a care facility: "We were not prepared. And it's just, I just want to pick your brain a little bit because, you know, it's too late for us, but for other people out there who are my age, 63, or older, maybe a little bit younger and have got elderly parents, you need to, you need to plan for this."

This deeply personal moment cut through the typical financial advisor talk to touch the human reality of aging in America. Fishman didn't sugarcoat the situation, noting that with the demographics of the post-war generation aging, we face a potential crisis of unprecedented scale.

"And in our society, our safety net is not as strong as it is in most of the other industrialized nations in the world," Fishman candidly observed, briefly letting his "left-wing leaning" show. "As a result, it's on you. It's on you as an individual to do your planning."

Because in America, we've decided that caring for our elderly is a personal responsibility rather than a social one – unlike virtually every other developed nation that somehow manages to provide dignified eldercare without bankrupting families.

With 40-50% of retiring Americans unable to handle even a $400 unexpected expense, the financial advisor stressed the need to explore insurance products—from life insurance to annuities and long-term care options—that provide some protection against catastrophic eldercare costs. But the subtext was clear: our system leaves millions of Americans vulnerable to financial ruin from eldercare expenses that in other countries would be covered by public systems.

"The best time to plant a tree was 10 years ago, the second best time is today," Ben wisely noted about financial planning. Fishman's parting wisdom? Even if protective measures "don't pay the full costs, they might ease the burden some."

In today's precarious economic climate, even partial protection feels like a victory – which says everything about how low we've set the bar for taking care of our elderly.

Gumption Guru: Robert B. O'Connor on Self-Improvement When Life Gets Tough

The second segment featured author Robert B. O'Connor discussing his book "Gumptionade: The Booster for Yourself Improvement Plan"—a workbook born from O'Connor's personal experience with what he candidly called "30 days of hell" following a failed marriage and business troubles.

"I broke down a few years ago," O'Connor read from his introduction. "The nearest causes were a second failed marriage in a business that was breached and sinking, my income and fragile ego handcuffed to the oars. I had a month of harrowing anxiety, perfect insomnia, and despair. The only thing I did with any conviction was journal and hope for the return of my right mind. That was the beginning of the book that is now Gumptionade."

There's something refreshingly honest about O'Connor's approach – no promises of overnight transformation or secret techniques that will magically solve all your problems. Instead, he offers hard-won wisdom from someone who has been through the wringer and found a way forward.

O'Connor's philosophy centers around "gumption"—that old-fashioned blend of courage, resourcefulness, and common sense that helps people overcome life's inevitable difficulties. His book takes inspiration from Thomas Huxley's quote: "Perhaps the most valuable result of all education is the ability to make yourself do the thing you have to do when it ought to be done, whether you like it or not."

With refreshing realism, O'Connor outlined the typical timeline of self-improvement projects: "Day one of your journey to your new and better self is really fun, you know, there's the sun's out, the birds are singing, you're walking along the path to self-improvement, it's all smiles." But by day four, "you wake up in a dark and swampy place, your diet book is in tatters, your new running shoes are filthy, your backpack smells like garbage, and you're nauseated and depressed."

This "day four" phenomenon explains why so many diets, exercise regimens, and self-improvement plans collapse so quickly – we set off with great optimism but very little preparation for the inevitable challenges.

In a culture obsessed with overnight transformations and 30-day challenges, acknowledging that real change is hard, slow, and often painful feels almost revolutionary.

The rocket image on his book cover symbolizes how changing entrenched behaviors requires immense initial energy, just as a rocket uses 80% of its fuel just to escape Earth's gravity. "When you try to change and try to get rid of a bad habit or try to do real self-improvement, 80% of the difficulty is going to be getting that separation from the thinking you have behind that behavior," O'Connor explained.

O'Connor's insights on "suffering better" particularly resonated. "We're going to suffer in this life," he noted pragmatically. "We might as well suffer in a way that makes us better." He contrasted productive suffering (like the discomfort of starting a fitness regimen) with unproductive suffering (like the consequences of procrastination or substance abuse).

In a world where comfort and ease are sold as the ultimate goals, there's something deeply countercultural about embracing productive suffering as a path to growth.

Most compelling was his emphasis on kindness as fundamental to self-improvement: "I learned into my suffering to be kind to others, and when I learned to be kind to others, I learned to be kind to myself," O'Connor shared, offering a gentle counterbalance to the sometimes harsh discipline associated with personal development.

Reflections on a Radio Hour: The Personal Within the Political

Today's Buckmaster Show reminds us that beneath the abstractions of economic policy and self-help philosophies lie deeply personal human experiences. Whether it's families struggling to find affordable housing, adult children facing the heartbreak of placing parents in care facilities they can barely afford, or individuals picking themselves up after personal and professional collapse, these are the lived realities behind the statistics and theories.

From Fishman's critique of economic theatrics to O'Connor's embrace of productive suffering, the conversations offered listeners valuable perspectives on preparing for life's inevitable challenges in a system that often seems designed to make those challenges harder rather than easier.

What's your financial contingency plan for eldercare? Have you factored these potentially enormous costs into your retirement planning? How has the housing affordability crisis affected your life or the lives of people you know? And when you've faced personal setbacks, what has helped you maintain your "gumption" and push through to better days?

Share your thoughts in the comments below. The conversations we have here can help build community understanding around these critical issues that affect us all, even when mainstream media and political discourse fail to address them with the depth they deserve.

Quotes

Ben Buehler-Garcia - Guest host of the Bill Buckmaster Show and host of American Warrior Radio
- "The best time to plant a tree was 10 years ago, the second best time is today." (On financial planning)
- Shared personal experience: "We had to make a hard decision to place a family member in a care home. And I had absolutely no idea. We were not prepared."
Shelly Fishman - Financial advisor and regular contributor to the Buckmaster Show
- "There is whiplash going on big time right now."
- "Using tariffs as a bludgeon to get people to talk to you is entirely unnecessary and has never worked."
- "Our safety net is not as strong as it is in most of the other industrialized nations in the world."
Robert B. O'Connor - Author of "Gumptionaid: The Booster for Yourself Improvement Plan"
- "We're going to suffer in this life. It's part of being human, and we might as well suffer in a way that makes us better."
- "When I learned to be kind to others, I learned to be kind to myself."
- On genius vs. gumption: "Genius is usually not transferable outside of that person's area of genius." (Used Michael Jordan's failed baseball career as an example)
Donald Trump - Current US President (as of the show date in 2025)
- Referenced as making an "agreement to have an agreement" with China about tariffs
Thomas Huxley - 19th-century British biologist, quoted in O'Connor's book
- "Perhaps the most valuable result of all education is the ability to make yourself do the thing you have to do when it ought to be done, whether you like it or not."

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